The inhert flaw with paying for dating sites

OkCupid has another excellent break down of dating sites, this time its showing how the business models of eHarmony, Match.com and others are conflicting with users finding each other on the site.

If you’ve ever joined a paid for site or even interacted with one in anyway, you will instantly recognise this problem, and this is just the start of the problems.

Pay Sites Want You To Message These Dead Profiles

As you can see from the flow chart, the only way they don’t make money is to show subscribers to other subscribers. It’s the worst thing they can do for their business, because there’s no potential for new profit growth there. Remember: the average account length is just six months, and people join for big blocks of time at once, so getting a new customer on board is better for them than eking another month or two out of a current subscriber. To get sign-ups, they need to pull in new people, and they do this by getting you to message their prospects.

If you’re a subscriber to a pay dating site, you are an important (though unwitting) part of that site’s customer acquisition team. Of course, they don’t want to show you too many ghosts, because you’ll get frustrated and quit, but that doesn’t change the fact that they’re relying on you your messages are their marketing materials to reach out to non-payers and convince them, by way of your charming, heartfelt messages, to pull out their credit cards. If only a tiny fraction of your message gets a response, hey, that’s okay, you’re working for free. Wait a second…you’re paying them.

There is a nasty speed dating service which I used once, which adds its results to a paid for dating service. Luckily everyone who was at the event could message each other if they both gave each other ticks in the speed dating section but you would also get loads of messages from people who were paid for members, so you couldn’t read the actual message. Of course most of the actual messages would be from spammers. Weirdly, I’ve gotten more spam from the paid for services that the free one. Maybe another investigation for OKTrends?

Urgently on the look for hot properties

Fake passport or over sensitive policing?

I tweeted at 19:33, 15th Jan from Amsterdam Airport – Sitting in airport police in amsterdam airport, they think my passport is faked

I had come back from Amsterdam after giving a talk at Follow the Money conference about BBC Backstage, Everthing was going well and I had plenty of time to catch up with some of the CES coverage using Boxee but when I got to passport control things seemed to be taking too long to look at my passport. About 10 people passed me on the other booth while I was standing there watching this police officer messing with a small microscope type thing. I was prepared for the questioning I usually only get at flights into Chicago O’Hare. But it never happened. Instead someone else came to the booth and the agents talked for a second in dutch, then the first one came out of the booth and gestured for me to follow him into a room less that 5 meters away.

Yep its one of those backrooms where theres people coming in and out. Massive mirror you just know isn’t a mirror, I was sure it was a 2 way mirror or I was being paranoid. When i sat down there was a woman who had gotten a new passport and something was missing from it. Not sure but a phone call later, she was up and out of the room. I waited while 2 officers looked over my passport, one with a microscope. After a while they left it on the table. A new guy came in from eastern europe and sat next to me. His passport also was suspect I assumed.

Anyway after about 30mins, we both get moved to a new location, I swear it was on the opposite side of the airport for another sit down for another 30mins while a 3rd officer looks at the passport under some machine. The officer walking us down said it was quicker to go down there, than send my passport down there and wait for it to come back. After a while of waiting it was decided that maybe the passport was fine and that the RFID tag might be a little faulty or something. Those rfid chips in passports are bull I was told I was free to go but I should follow the officer back through the back way to make the plane.

The trek to the gate was fast and frantic. They had left me about 20mins before the airplane closes its door which would be fine if I was super fit like these dutch officers. Being marched down to my gate so I don’t miss my plane. This airport feels like 10 miles long, but I’m out and coming home

It was certainly a struggle keeping up through the miles of tunnels and doors. I quickly grabbed a few gifts in the shop and boarded the plane back home. Only to be stuck in a queue for 50mins on the UK side because of new passport checks… Geez, I slept well that night…

New Year Resolutions 2010

Myself

So I’ve already done a review of 2009, so its time for my 2010 resolutions.

  1. Go skiing on real snow
    This is a carry over from 2009. I really need to just go do this, specially since there is a fake skiing place in Manchester’s Trafford Centre.
  2. Blog more
    Since Twitter, i’ve been blogging a lot less. This needs to stop as this is my base and twitter isn’t. Although I can aggregate with things like storytlr, i’m very interested the support for the twitter/open-microblogging api by wordpress/automatic.
  3. A better routine and live more healthy
    Goes without saying really but I’m already signed up to PureGym the 24hour Gym but need a doctors note saying I’m not going to die of a asthmatic attack if I use a running machine before I can go for the introduction. I’m also attempting to go to sleep before 2am every night and wake up at a decent time. I need to go to more comedy clubs too.
  4. Kick off Manchester werewolf night again
    We started playing werewolf in Manchester at the start of last year as a monthly thing in the BBC bar but moved it out to Space soon after as we got more people. I want to grow it a little and run a couple special one-off’s around events like FutureEverything and other conferences in the city. Actually the 1st one of the year will be Wednesday 3rd Feb if your interested.
  5. Find my perfect development stack
    I was meant to be learning Python but it just didn’t feel right for me. Apache Cocoon 2.1 is still my baby and I use it for all types of little bits and pieces but Cocoon 2.2 and 3.x are completely different. I could/maybe should learn how use them and the new Maven approach, Maven also seems to work well in Eclipse and Netbeans (didn’t I mention I like Netbeans).
    I like the idea of XQuery specially because it does most of the things I want to do in my web applications. Add in Exist DB the open source xml database and I got a complete backend stack. I’m also still liking the idea behind ZK to ease with the front end, although I know everyone is loving a javascript library over a complete framework. Lastly I’m looking more and more into XProc but I don’t feel this will help with my development stack.
  6. Playout live more
    I’m going out clubbing more which is great but I’m feeling the need to playout/dj out loud. There’s not many trance clubs in Manchester and I’ve already tried to join the Rong Trance night via a competition. So heck why not setup my own night? Well it looks like I found a venue (TV21 in the Trendy Northern Quarter) and a couple other djs who also want to play out live. So who knows…
  7. Use even more graphics
    Inkscape, napkin sketches, raytracing are all working for me. Now I’m sketching on my ebook reader in some meetings so I just need better ways to integrate them into my presentations and work.
  8. Upgrade sooner if it makes a noticeable difference
    Sometimes I wait too long to upgrade software and hardware. For example I waited till my old battery only holds 12% charge before getting a new one. This is fine but having to go to meetings next door with a power adapter is a pain. I should have bought a new battery ages ago. I also waited too long to upgrade to Gwibber 2.0 for sure. This also extends to other stuff for example I just bought some new trainers after 3+ years of wearing the last one to near collapse. All this stuff is worth just buying earlier to avoid all the stresses which go into keeping the previous generation alive. Talking of which I really should upgrade my camera to a DSLR soon.
  9. Be involved in a regular podcast
    I started one with a few friends but we never really got it off the ground due to our pretty hectic lifestyles. However now I know I can do skype over my Orange HSDPA connection and it still sounds great, I should be able to do it from anywhere I am. So its just a matter of being committed really.
  10. Buy a flat in Central Manchester
    People have been wondering what happened with this. Well it was all happening then the mortgage deposits when from 10% to 20% across all lenders, which ruled me out of buying a 2 bedroom place. However this year I’m confident that I’ll be on the property ladder again. Although I’m thinking maybe I should consider one bedroom places too.
  11. Avoid all online services which don’t perform to my acceptable levels of data portability
    Its 2010, theres no need for closed systems which don’t talk to anything else. No OpenID or OAuth? You won’t see me signing up in the future. Can’t get my data out on to my own site via some API? forget about it, I’m not even going to venture near it.
  12. Play more games
    I love games but never play enough of them. There’s a whole selection of great games which I’ve not played which I think I’m missing out on. For example I bought Portal the other day for a day when I’m sick and need to stay in. Theres some amazingly inspiring games out there which must be played.

My New Year Resolutions of 2009

So its about time to start looking into the future again and making those resolutions… Looking at the previous ones for 2009 things have not gone exactly to plan.

  1. Go skiing on real snow
    Didn’t happen, will have to carry this one over…
  2. Work and execute a Alternative Reality Game
    Also didn’t happen, but I may have to sub this one for writing a book
  3. Build up a better routine
    Its starting to happen but not quite yet, but give it a little more time and things will be better. I’m going start getting up earlier and go to bed earlier that currently.
  4. Work smarter, with less pace and less stress
    This is happening, but there is still smarter ways I could be working. I’ll try and document some of this too of course.
  5. Go out more and be live more heathly
    Yep, I think I’ve drunk more beer and wine this year that ever before. So I’m certainly going out a lot more but living more heathly, not quite. This year that will change.
  6. Be more daring with matters of the heart
    Yeah I’m not doing so bad there… Between OKCupid, Speed Dating, etc I’ve done a reasonable job enjoying myself and not holding back.
  7. Start organising Werewolf and Werewolf+ nights in the North
    Started well but dropped the ball a bit half way through the year when barcamp, tedx, etc kicked in. I should certainly get this going again, as I do enjoy a good game of Werewolf.
  8. Build a web application
    So I got a couple of kick ass ideas which I do want to build and with my new thoughts about using Xquery instead of Python, means I’m a lot more likely to build what I’m thinking in my spare time.
  9. Blog every film I watch
    So I started doing this via twitter using the hashtags film and movie but due to twitters archiving system, they got sucked away before I noticed. Someone pointed me towards 140 film review. So who knows maybe I might use that or come up with some simple Xquery to pull my reviews into a storage container using Twitter/Indenti.ca
  10. Read more
    This has happened a lot, since I bought my ebook reader I’ve read about 15 books in about 4x the speed I usually would. I can see this increasing in the future.
  11. More Trance music
    I’ve not done may trance mixes recently but once I get this competition mix out the way I’ll be uploading them regularly again. I’m also making a habit of listening to Armin Van Buuren and other dj shows at work and making a note of top tunes. I also noticed I spent about 150 pounds last year on tunes from AudioJelly and Juno.
  12. Lots more graphics
    Yep this is happening, I’m also getting faster at drawing in inkscape and explaining the after graphics. I’m hoping next year to be able to do complete presentations based on the graphs alone. I’m also going to start using some of the techniques Dan Roam uses in the back of the napkin

I’m loving my Blender

I bought a blender after years of wanting one. Amazing purchase, nice modern design and reasonable cheap at only 25 pounds. So far I've made some amazing smoothies since.

Last night I threw in 3 granny smith apples, about 6 ice cubes, juice of one orange, a squeeze of lemon juice and a small spoon of brown sugar. Let the blender go to work on the lot and out popped this green stuff which looked like crushed lemongrass. But it tasted so good, like a ice junkie you get from cinemas but without the stupid amounts of sugar. In actual fact I was getting 2 of my 5 fruits for the day.

Today, Green Grapes, Cranberries, Blueberries mixed together till it goes all pink, served in a large tall glass, yum yum.

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Tesco: All that technology but no ethnic food?

Tesco's online store for home delivery is great, I've been using it for something coming up to a decade I'm sure. But what I don't understand is with all the choice, options and clever ways to drill through the database of items, you still can not buy or order ethnic food or drink.

I'm sure I've highlighted this problem before and Tesco said it depends on which store your close to. Aka they only reflect whats in the store around the corner. Well I'm sorry but its almost 2010 and thats not a acceptable excuse as far as I'm concerned. Imagine if Amazon said that?

What kills me is I'm only after Popcorn Kernals to go in my new popcorn machine. I had no idea that Popcorn Kernals are ethnic goods, wow because they are so exotic of course. So now on top of my full tesco order, I now need to head down to ASDA in Hulme to buy Popcorn Kernals and a loaf of hard dough bread. Tesco if your listening, everything should be available, if it requires extra time or effort to get the item, warn the customer and in extreme cases, suggest a very small service charge. I would have paid at 50p extra to have it delivered instead of having to scoot down to hulme just to pick up two items.

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Girlfriend Scared by Fake Head in Bed

I'm sure everyone's seen this video, its being played to death online but it still cracks me up when I watch it again. Yes its kind of cruel but you got to laugh when the guy pokes his girlfriend with the broom handle and the look on her face when she sees the head in the bed can not be faked. What would you do if you woke up to a stranger where your partner was meant to be?

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Second-Hand Sex Toy Competition

Sex toy 1 Sex Toy 2

Not the usual thing I have on my blog but I couldn't help but find this one funny and entertaining. Details for the competition is available on from McBirdie's Blog. Here's a bit to tempt you in…

Sure, money’s tight with the never-ending recession–everyone is trying to finally get on board with re-using, recycling, and giving things they own a whole new purpose in life. Why should sex toys be any different? Not only does it mean you’ve managed to find a new use for something, it’s…just darned funny to see a sex toy floating out in the world in a completely innocuous role.

So what we would like to do is see you use your sex toys in a way that amuses, confounds, or just darn tickles us. Whether you find that your vibrator makes for a great milk foamer or a string of anal beads make for a lovely necklace, take a picture and send it in. If you’re feeling especially creative, you can put together a video (no longer than 3 minutes, please–we have no kind of attention span).

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Don’t bring back the Bananas, please

bananas have split

I've been raving about the new kiwis, apples and limes innocent drink/smoothie for sometime. I'm not the biggest fan of Bananas and a smoothie without Bananas was always going to float my boat. Lovely drink and actually pretty good for you. Innocent drinks have been asking for feedback on this edition of there drinks, so I'm giving it two thumbs up. I've also learned if you mix it with a small amount of lime or apple vodka it makes a great little cocktail too. Not too much or it goes a little funky in texture.

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